I took a job at a fairly young software company that had a red hot product that was "required" to be purchased by suppliers to the automotive, retail, aerospace, and many other industries. This company had experienced incredible growth going from 2 people to over 500 in 2 years.
The guy who hired me, lets call him Robert, was fairly elderly, stoic, you know the type that never smiles, laughs, walks down the halls head cocked to one side and looking at his feet. Not an outgoing sort at all.
After I was hired this guy, Robert, started calling me Bruce, not Hesh, but Bruce for some reason. Being the arse that I am I thought that is was kind of funny so I never corrected him............
After perhaps a month the folks who worked for me had filled me in on the local politics and what to do and what NOT to do. Above all things there was a general conscience to avoid Robert who was the senior executive management at the facility. Moreover, avoid going into the restroom located right across from my office after lunch because Robert took his daily dump then......
Anyway I was new in town and went to lunch with some co-workers and got sick from what I ate. I came back from lunch, felt VERY sick to my stomach, but I remembered to avoid the restroom across from my office.
But to my dismay the other restroom was out of order so I had no choice. As I opened the door to the restroom that I was to avoid Robert had just come in and was headed into a stall. Before he closed the door he nodded at me, said hi Bruce to me, and went into the stall. My only choice was the stall next to him.......
Anyway with out going into the details here I was sick to my stomach...... Robert on the other hand was quickly filling in the blanks as to why this restroom was to be avoided at this time of day. He had terrible constipation and made the loudest, grunting and pain like noises that I have ever heard......
On the other hand I exploded and continued to do so for several minutes.
All of a sudden I hear Robert talking to me from his stall and he said - Hey Bruce, how do your crap so easily?
I replied - Robert that's nothing, wait until I get my pants down..........
Robert roared with laughter and people could hear him in the halls and later asked me about what had happened in the rest room.
Upon leaving the stall Robert made eye contact with me with a huge grin on his face and said - Bruce that was the funniest thing that I have ever heard.
I replied - glad you liked it Robert but you know something? He nodded and I said - my name is Hesh, for a month now you have been calling me Bruce but my name is Hesh........ Robert laughed and apologized and from that day on when ever he saw me in the halls he pointed at me, laughed, and said "you are Hesh right?"
And so goes the story of Bruce..... True story.[/b]
